In Relation to the Many Realms
The word Hakomi is believed to be a transmission from the Hopi people, and it means this:
"Where do you stand in relation to these many realms?"
To give some context to this, I will first share that in Hakomi Somatic Therapy or Coaching, one of the five core principles is mindfulness.
Hakomi is not like the typical idea of mindfulness meditation. It is more like supported present moment awareness in which you are in dialogue with a practitioner who is gently encouraging you to stay engaged with your internal, present moment, felt experience during a therapy session.
In a state of mindfulness, we are able to cultivate dual awareness. This means that we are able to remain connected to the present moment while touching layers of our core material.
Core material could be memories, images, or felt sensations in the body that are connected to the way we have become organized in our perception of the world, and in our fundamental beliefs about self based on early life experiences.
So, the fundamental question here is "Who are you?"
Where do you stand in relation to the many challenges and experiences in your life? Cultivating an inner witness is one way that we are able to get to know ourselves more fully, and to understand how we are relating to our core experiences that have shaped our unconscious perceptions and beliefs that impact our present experience.
In Hakomi, the purpose of mindfulness, or supported present moment awareness, is to build a bridge from the realms of the unconscious to the conscious.
In a session, once we have touched something that feels important or alive in you, I will encourage you to first and foremost slow down and stay with that experience.
Slowing down is vital to gaining insight.
Once we have slowed down enough for you to feel the contours of your experience, I may then offer an experiment executed in a state of mindfulness to elicit a core unconscious response so that you can become conscious of it.
For example, you may be supported to repeat a movement or some words that I see or hear as potentially holding some significant clues into your subconscious terrain, with the intention of bringing unconscious material to your conscious awareness.
While you repeat the movement (for example, tightening a fist) or the words (usually words with emotional tone to them), you will be encouraged to slow down, repeat, and study the experience in mindfulness to learn more about that impulse.
I may take over the words or movements for you so that you can hear or see them outside of yourself. Props may be used to support certain impulses, for example using a pillow to support your inclination to hide, or wrapping a blanket around you tightly to support the impulse to contract.
Another experiment may be doing the opposite of the impulse, for example, opening your arms while you speak instead of crossing them. Together, we notice what happens next and deepen further into your experience from there.
When these natural impulses are studied in a state of mindfulness, always with your permission, and with a sense of safety and trust in the therapeutic relationship, you can begin to feel what core material is underneath these impulses.
Transformation occurs when you not only gain insight into what your unconscious core material is, but you also get a sense of what a missing core nourishment is, and you have a felt experience of that nourishment.
Once you have a felt experience of the missing nourishment (some examples may include receiving the caring presence of the therapist or coach, or allowing yourself to rest, or feeling safe to express an emotion), you will be supported to linger in that experience to give your system some time to adjust to the feeling of a new potential way of being.
This will evoke neuroplasticity, and support you to integrate this experience into your daily life.
Integration is key for long term change, and therefore, you will be supported to take a few minutes together at the end of each session to debrief what just happened, and collaborate on how you can take what you just experienced or learned to infiltrate into your life.
To note, the above stated sequence of a session is a general guideline for Hakomi-informed session.
Not every session will be transformative, and no two sessions will be the same. With the principle of organicity in mind, I will not hold any agenda, other than to keep you safe inside of the window of tolerance, to stay within the principles of Hakomi, and to allow for the organic unfolding of your process.
My intention is to hold what we discover together with loving presence, curiosity, and willingness to support you with whatever arises, whether that is supporting you to deepen further or to help you lean toward resourcing if the material we uncover is overwhelming.
